Disappointment. Sadness. Anger. Acceptance.
These are the stages of being slighted on your birthday by a Special Man Friend. Rearrange it a little bit, and it becomes SAAD. As in “I’m SOOOOO SAAD he didn’t care enough to do anything!”
Since the last post I had transitioned from the second to the third stage.
I woke around 6am the next morning, replaying everything in my (already overly obsessive) mind.
The more I thought about it, the more infuriated I became.
“Clearly he doesn’t think our birthday is important. Which means he doesn’t think we’re important. Otherwise he would have made more of an effort.” Said my imaginary alter ego Princess Kathleen. “Your highness refuse to be mistreated!”
She also likes to refer to herself in third person.
“Oh but…he did try. He said all those things about archery and wanted to get us cake. It’s unfortunate that the store shut down…” Argued my more understanding and always accommodating alter ego, Kat.
She calls herself Kat because she thinks it sounds more girl-next-door and approachable.
“TRY! SAID! WANTED TO! But where’s the action? Show me the ACTION!!!”
Princess Kathleen also likes to talk in CAPs.
“But under the circumstances…he probably thought we preferred dinner with friends…”
Kat on the other hand, tends to trail off, like this…
“Circumstances, SCHMIRCUMSTANCES! If a man really wanted to do something, he would make it HAPPEN!”
“You’re right. He obviously didn’t care very much…”
Yeah….Wait, WHAT??? Kat, I thought you were supposed to argue for the other side?
“Sorry pal, I’m gonna have to agree with Princess Kathleen on this one… I think…” Kat mumbled and went to get an imaginary latte with Princess Kathleen, and I was left by myself to stare at the ceiling.
I finally couldn’t stand it anymore, and jumped out of bed.
“I gotta go home.” I started to gather my belongings and made up some excuses about marking.
“Ok…” Johan looked confused. Being the opposite of a procrastinator( ie. the overly anxious) I rarely left work til Sundays.
Mindlessly, I started to rifle through other parts of the apartment for my stuff. Toothbrush: check! Makeup case: check! Cardigan that I never wear: check! I didn’t know why I was doing this, since I left stuff here all the time. All I knew was that I wanted to get out of there ASAP. Leave now, think later, I decided.
“So…since you’re gonna be away for a month. How do you want to keep in touch during that time?” Johan asked hesitantly.
I almost forgot that I was leaving in two days for Chinese New Year!
“Um…we’ll see.” I answered coolly.
“Well…should we call each other once a day? Once a week?” He stood helplessly as I flipped over cushions and peeked under beds. In case I left something important, wallet…cellphone… my Minion socks.
“It doesn’t really matter…” I replied absentmindedly as I struggled to fit everything into my tiny handbag. “If we can’t manage to keep in touch…Have a nice life eh?”
He looked taken aback, but unsure whether I was joking or not.
As he walked me to the door, he tried again “So we’ll talk on Wechat?”
I paused at the door frame as we stood in silence.
Then I finally said “Have a nice life.”
As I walked away, I heard him yell “Well, have a nice life to you too!”
Followed by the sound of a door slam shut.