Chapter 35- Bamboo, Boats and End of Year 2!

“I hate dating!” said Feegs last night. “I wish I could just give up!”

“Enjoy it while you can!” I replied while absentmindedly stirring a pot “Once you find the one, you’ll miss it a little. All the drama, the possibilities….”

I look up and she’s giving me the dirtiest look.

The good thing about giving up, is that free from the pressure of being on constant lookout, you can just enjoy life and dance like no one’s business!

That’s what I did by the end of year two, I swore off dating and started living.

And second year went out with a couple of bangs.

First, in true expat style, we took a trip to a nearby town famous for bamboo forests and less populated air. About 10 of us went, including Julien, myself and the Awesome group of friends we met at Jasper’s party.

The trip was awesome too. We went hiking, white water rafting and made a camp fire. It was also surprisingly drama free. No intergroup hook up, backstabbing nor name-calling. Ie. No need to talk about it.

So here are some pictures. Done.

Stolen from the world's greatest photographer
Stolen from the world’s greatest photographer


P.S. If you ever go there, can you buy me some bamboo towels? K? Thanks.

The next big thing was the boat party. I know I already talked about a boat party, but there’s no such thing as too many boat parties. When I get a boat… Wait, I’m a teacher… Never mind.

Lucy, Ronnie, and Helen have recovered enough from their breakups to come out to what I consider my “going away boat party”. Helen also invited her new friends Frances and Seth.

Jasper the pilot and his friend came as well, however the two of them soon disappeared. It took us a while to find them, and immediately we all started asking (loudly) why they were manning the ticket booth.

“Just hush, and gimme your wrists!” Jasper said exasperated.

“What! Why?!?!?” All of us started shouting again.

Finally they quieted us down enough to slap a pink bracelet on all our wrists.

“What does… V…I…P…stand for?” Lucy looked at her bracelet confused.

“Very Insane Party.” Said Helen matter-of-factly.

“No, it means Very Important Person.” I started laughing “Wait…are WE very important people???”

It turns out that while we were too busy taking selfies, Jasper and his friend offered to help the ticket girl so she can take a bathroom break. Now we paid maybe 100 ~150 kuai for the regular ticket, which entitled us to 2 free drinks. However, with the VIP ticket(600 kuai) we now had free flow…champagne!

All night long!!!

Boat and champagne! What more could a girl ask for??? Hmm, maybe a chocolate fountain made of diamonds would be nice…

Any who, once Jasper joined us, we started laughing at our incredible luck and somewhat shady maneuvers…But with free champagne, all ethics are out the boat!

“A toast! To new friends!” I raised my Red Solo cup. “An incredible year! And more to come!”

“Gan-bei!” everyone cheered as they chugged their drinks.

The rest of the night was a champagne filled blur of stupid dancing, and inappropriate gridding.


Couple things that I do remember:

Jasper was being extra flirty that night. When I brought up the question of his girlfriend. He got mad and left. More on that later.

Helen made out with Seth, then went to meet another guy she was pining after. Unfortunately he had a girlfriend at the moment. His name is Mick. He’s important later on. So just remember Mick…Mick Jagger…We Moved like Jagger that night….

Frances bumped into her cheating ex-boyfriend and started crying. Jasper’s friend picked her up and carried her away. We comforted her by saying that he’s a dog and she deserves better.

All in all, “Very Insane Party” indeed…

Not too bad when the drama isn’t mine. I’ve had enough drama that year.

When I went back to Canada for the summer, a friend asked how my second year in Shanghai was.

“Freaking incredible!” I raved.

“Oh yeah? Think you’ll stay longer then?” She asked.

“Nope.” I replied. “Next year will be my absolute last.”

“Why? Since you love it there…” She was confused.

I thought about it, then said:

“Because. There is just absolutely. Without a doubt. Zero chance for true romance.”


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