“I can wait one more year, 2 or 3 years even. I just need to know there’s an end.” Bob replied when I informed him of my decision to stay.
That’s when I finally realized that I didn’t return his feelings, and how unfair I was being to him this whole time.
Once I realized what I was doing, I could no longer, in good consciences, continue to string him along.
So I told him we needed to break up. Not the let’s-stay-friends kind of break up, but the zero contact kind. A clean break.
He resisted at first, saying he didn’t understand why we couldn’t keep in touch even if we do break up. We continued to plan our summer road trip together. He bought the tablet computer I wanted. As friends.
I know I know, I should have insisted. I would have looked sooooo much better in this story! A strong female protagonist. Always doing the right thing despite it being hard.
Instead I was weak again. He convinced me we could stay friends…
Goddamn early 20-somethings.
Oh, who am I kidding? I’m still annoyingly inconsistent and unsure of myself. But I’m sure by 30 I’ll be better! Right? Yes…Probably.
Luckily, he came to his senses. A few days later, he sent me a very formal email.
“I know you mentioned a clean break. I think this would be an appropriate time to do so. I hope in the long run we can remain cordial with each other. I wish you all the best.”
Good for you Bob! Bravo!
Thanks for showing me the kind of love I deserve. Even if I didn’t deserve yours.
I wish you all the best too. Truly.